I have to confess in the past I thought “I just don’t have time to work on my marriage” – or excused my husband because he was just too busy. Now I laugh when I hear people say this. I know from experience that when I don’t take the time to maintain a good marriage it takes a ton of time (and for us – it took money too!) to restore the relationship.
I do wonder why God made everything in life take so much maintenance! From our personal appearance to our homes, cars and relationships….everything takes maintenance! And when I don’t stay on top of things, they end up overwhelming me. When I don’t keep up with my daily chores and let everyone slide on their daily chores the house becomes a wreck and I dread dread dread the cleanup! So it is with my marriage. A good yearly spring cleaning is still a good idea even when I stay up with the daily disciplines but it doesn’t have to be so intense.
Marriage takes daily discipline too. From the things talked about in Step #4 like listening, affection, affirmation, unexpected gifts, to the simple loving words and gestures that communicate a desire for a good relationship. When we let these daily disciplines go, we’re in for trouble.
While a marriage retreat, counseling or coaching may do a marriage a world of good, life is a lot more pleasant when we take the time to regularly nurture our relationships then, do these things to enrich a good thing – making a good marriage great – like a good spring cleaning on a well kept house.
If your daily disciplines have been lacking and you’re feeling that sense of overwhelm or hopelessness – don’t despair – just do something!You may be able to simply begin implementing good daily relational disciplines. You may need to begin healing through counseling. Or coaching may be right for you. When you want a better future and consciously make the choice to do something(s) differently, realizing that you have the power to be greater than the problem, you can count on a future that is better than ever before. Whether your relationship is in shambles or just status quo – coaching can make a big difference. And it can help even if your spouse isn’t interested. As the saying goes, “it only takes one person to change the world” and all you want to do is change your marriage!
One of my mottos for life that has served me very well: When something isn’t working, try something different – even if I’m not thrilled with any of my options. . . different is always better because even if it doesn’t work, it leads me to the next step which is one step closer to my solution. As you take time to consider what step you’ll take, try…..
Step #9
Spend a little time daily
to save a lot of time later
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OH BROTHER! |